At some point in my twenties, my mother mailed me a collection of letters I had begun writing as a child but never came even close to finishing. Generally, they went like this:
Dear Grandma:
How are you? I am fine.
And that was it.
I imagine that as soon as I wrote those words, I would sit there for a minute wondering what I could possibly say to a woman in her 80s or 90s whom I barely knew. And then I’d take off—to watch Sesame Street, maybe, or to roller-skate, or to play with my parakeet.
In adulthood, I’ve gotten much better at follow-through. But Exhibit A, below, demonstrates that I’m not entirely cured of project abandonment syndrome. It’s a screenshot of blogs that I have begun to write but haven’t come close to completing.
Dear Grandma:
How are you? I am fine.
And that was it.
I imagine that as soon as I wrote those words, I would sit there for a minute wondering what I could possibly say to a woman in her 80s or 90s whom I barely knew. And then I’d take off—to watch Sesame Street, maybe, or to roller-skate, or to play with my parakeet.
In adulthood, I’ve gotten much better at follow-through. But Exhibit A, below, demonstrates that I’m not entirely cured of project abandonment syndrome. It’s a screenshot of blogs that I have begun to write but haven’t come close to completing.
Call it ADD. Call it sporadic anti-stick-to-itiveness. Whatever the reason, sometimes when I’m left to my own devices, I don’t finish what I’ve started.
So today, I thought I’d give you a micro-blog for each of these five topics so I can purge all my lingering drafts. I’ll get a clean slate; you’ll get a smorgasblog.
Let’s go from oldest to newest.
So today, I thought I’d give you a micro-blog for each of these five topics so I can purge all my lingering drafts. I’ll get a clean slate; you’ll get a smorgasblog.
Let’s go from oldest to newest.
English morphs. (Abandoned July 3, 2020.)
People often complain to me about the “misuse” of words and grammar. But the fact is, language changes constantly. That’s why we don’t speak anything like the characters in The Canterbury Tales. And it’s why the twelfth edition of Merriam-Webster’s Collegiate Dictionary, published in October of this year, contains more than 5,000 new entries.
It’s not just sick being used to mean impressive or literally being used as an intensifier. Spelling changes too. For example, as late as 1972 (when the following ad was printed), Sanka was still using the spelling caffein (no final e).
People often complain to me about the “misuse” of words and grammar. But the fact is, language changes constantly. That’s why we don’t speak anything like the characters in The Canterbury Tales. And it’s why the twelfth edition of Merriam-Webster’s Collegiate Dictionary, published in October of this year, contains more than 5,000 new entries.
It’s not just sick being used to mean impressive or literally being used as an intensifier. Spelling changes too. For example, as late as 1972 (when the following ad was printed), Sanka was still using the spelling caffein (no final e).
At some point between 1972 and now, the spelling became caffeine. Today, if you visit Merriam-Webster.com, you won’t see caffein at all.
So, the next time someone reaches out to me on LinkedIn to lament the way modern word usage differs from what they were taught in sixth grade, I will just type a 😁 and share a link to this very blog.
Anger is inefficient. (Abandoned January 10, 2022.)
I only had a visual for this one—a screenshot from Facebook:
So, the next time someone reaches out to me on LinkedIn to lament the way modern word usage differs from what they were taught in sixth grade, I will just type a 😁 and share a link to this very blog.
Anger is inefficient. (Abandoned January 10, 2022.)
I only had a visual for this one—a screenshot from Facebook:
I’m struck by the fact that I’ve been ruminating about the hostile, intolerant, judgmental, polarized climate in the US for the better part of four years now (probably longer). Just recently, I’ve been fantasizing about making a T-shirt like this:
Other shirts might read: Ask questions and listen. Or: Try to understand instead of trying to win.
My point then, and my point now, is that too many people like to ascribe motives to others (see the screenshot above), while too few seem willing to ask non-judgmental questions in order to learn why others think what they do.
Not that you asked, but it is my belief that we need to stop making assumptions, stop depicting those with different perspectives into cartoonish villains, and stop interpreting the world in black and white (or blue and red).
Here, I will again make make a plug for Braver Angels, an organization dedicated to helping Americans “practice courageous citizenship across political differences.”
I have Disastro-Vision. (Abandoned July 24, 2024.)
I’d jotted down a few notes for this one:
That character on Electric Company who read the warning signs too slowly.
My well-honed ability to recognize cults and psychopaths.
My tendency to explore all the things that could happen (catastrophizing).
This blog was going to examine (and probably justify) my tendency to look out for every danger in every situation. I’ve written about this sort of thing before (claiming that worrying is my superpower), but I must have planned to plumb the depths of my “Disastro-Vision” in some new way.
Just now, I searched for the Electric Company cartoon mentioned above, but I couldn’t find it. As I recall, the story arc went like this: Cute little man approaches a sign with a word like DANGER. The poor guy is not a strong reader, so he slowwwwly sounds the word out over and over, never realizing there’s something like a pallet of bricks dangling over his head. He scratches his head in confusion just before getting crushed to death by the danger he failed to recognize.
Aaaaand, scene!
Now that I’m contemplating this terrible plot for an audience of children, I have to wonder if I made the whole thing up.
Cookbooks and other quixotic ... (Abandoned August 28, 2024.)
I didn’t even complete the title of this blog. 🙄 But again, I know what I wanted to write about.
I was considering how human beings do a fabulous job of wishful thinking, and how cookbooks are the very embodiment of our self-delusional optimism.
If you’re anything like me, when you flip through a cookbook in a bookstore, you see the recipes (and often, appetizing photos), and you imagine sitting down to enjoy the dishes portrayed. You envision serving them and receiving appreciative compliments. You trick yourself into thinking that if you just buy the book, those wonderful experiences are sure to follow.
Conveniently, you forget about reality.
Those recipes require planning and shopping. You invariably have to track down ingredients you don’t own, like tamarind paste or blueberry vinegar. Every new recipe is a time commitment and a risk—who among us hasn’t labored long in the kitchen to be met with a disappointing failure? And then, whether the results are sublime or sorry, every cooking endeavor requires cleanup.
So is it any wonder that my cookbooks sit on my shelf, collecting dust and mocking me?
Oh, but we love to hate. (Abandoned November 3, 2025.)
I barely began this one. I wrote:
I saw this bottom-of-the-article ad today, and I thought, “Lordy
And that was it.
I don’t even have the screenshot I captured that day, but it was one of those bottom-of-the-page clickbait ads trying to tempt you with some secret the medical establishment is allegedly hiding from you. The headline was along the lines of “Doctors hate him for revealing this one weird trick.”
I was thinking about why that headline was chosen, and why humans have such an attraction to hatred, resentment, conflict, revenge, and the like. (You might be noticing a theme with me here.)
But now, I’m going to completely abandon that topic and tell you what I learned while researching those bottom-of-the page clickbait ads. They have a name! And it’s both perfectly accurate and remarkably disgusting. (I have added it to my list of terrible words just for the way it sounds.) Please enjoy my link to the Wikipedia article entitled “Chumbox.”
My point then, and my point now, is that too many people like to ascribe motives to others (see the screenshot above), while too few seem willing to ask non-judgmental questions in order to learn why others think what they do.
Not that you asked, but it is my belief that we need to stop making assumptions, stop depicting those with different perspectives into cartoonish villains, and stop interpreting the world in black and white (or blue and red).
Here, I will again make make a plug for Braver Angels, an organization dedicated to helping Americans “practice courageous citizenship across political differences.”
I have Disastro-Vision. (Abandoned July 24, 2024.)
I’d jotted down a few notes for this one:
That character on Electric Company who read the warning signs too slowly.
My well-honed ability to recognize cults and psychopaths.
My tendency to explore all the things that could happen (catastrophizing).
This blog was going to examine (and probably justify) my tendency to look out for every danger in every situation. I’ve written about this sort of thing before (claiming that worrying is my superpower), but I must have planned to plumb the depths of my “Disastro-Vision” in some new way.
Just now, I searched for the Electric Company cartoon mentioned above, but I couldn’t find it. As I recall, the story arc went like this: Cute little man approaches a sign with a word like DANGER. The poor guy is not a strong reader, so he slowwwwly sounds the word out over and over, never realizing there’s something like a pallet of bricks dangling over his head. He scratches his head in confusion just before getting crushed to death by the danger he failed to recognize.
Aaaaand, scene!
Now that I’m contemplating this terrible plot for an audience of children, I have to wonder if I made the whole thing up.
Cookbooks and other quixotic ... (Abandoned August 28, 2024.)
I didn’t even complete the title of this blog. 🙄 But again, I know what I wanted to write about.
I was considering how human beings do a fabulous job of wishful thinking, and how cookbooks are the very embodiment of our self-delusional optimism.
If you’re anything like me, when you flip through a cookbook in a bookstore, you see the recipes (and often, appetizing photos), and you imagine sitting down to enjoy the dishes portrayed. You envision serving them and receiving appreciative compliments. You trick yourself into thinking that if you just buy the book, those wonderful experiences are sure to follow.
Conveniently, you forget about reality.
Those recipes require planning and shopping. You invariably have to track down ingredients you don’t own, like tamarind paste or blueberry vinegar. Every new recipe is a time commitment and a risk—who among us hasn’t labored long in the kitchen to be met with a disappointing failure? And then, whether the results are sublime or sorry, every cooking endeavor requires cleanup.
So is it any wonder that my cookbooks sit on my shelf, collecting dust and mocking me?
Oh, but we love to hate. (Abandoned November 3, 2025.)
I barely began this one. I wrote:
I saw this bottom-of-the-article ad today, and I thought, “Lordy
And that was it.
I don’t even have the screenshot I captured that day, but it was one of those bottom-of-the-page clickbait ads trying to tempt you with some secret the medical establishment is allegedly hiding from you. The headline was along the lines of “Doctors hate him for revealing this one weird trick.”
I was thinking about why that headline was chosen, and why humans have such an attraction to hatred, resentment, conflict, revenge, and the like. (You might be noticing a theme with me here.)
But now, I’m going to completely abandon that topic and tell you what I learned while researching those bottom-of-the page clickbait ads. They have a name! And it’s both perfectly accurate and remarkably disgusting. (I have added it to my list of terrible words just for the way it sounds.) Please enjoy my link to the Wikipedia article entitled “Chumbox.”
Now, if you’ll pardon me, I’m going to go delete everything in my drafts folder. Thanks for inspiring me to get this done!
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